Sail
by ChaseLehrman
Summary: Umm... i don't really know how to summarize this. basically this is Cat's thoughts and such, she blames a lot on A.D.D. Really bad summary, good story.
1. This is how I show my love

**Disclaimer: I own not the amazing show that is victorious, i only borrow the characters and make them do things.**

Cat's POV:

All kinds of doctors tell me I'm different, not in a bad way they try to say. They tell me i have attention deficit disorder, A.D.D for short. I guess I'm not really spacey after all i just can't focus on anything. Did you ever notice how trees look like a blur when your driving with the window up but they just look like trees when you roll down the window?

Therapists tell me that I show myself differently to others, But i stopped going to my therapist 'cause Jade showed me that it spelled out 'The rapist'. Jade. She's really pretty and nice, to me at least. She's like a piece of candy that you don't want to share with anyone you just want to save it all for your self. Have you ever wondered how chameleons change color?

I guess it was just my way of showing Jade how pretty i think she is but now i think she's mad at me. Her lips were so soft and warm though, can something that felt that good really be that bad? But Jade can make anything bad, she always looks at everything bad. But i see the good in her, i see how she cares. When she asked me why i did it i said "Blame it on my A.D.D. baby." and left before she could get mad. This is how i show my love.

I made that decision in my mind because i wasn't going to tell anyone. The only one who ever listens to me is Jade and she is currently mad at me... I think. Why do people always laugh when i ask questions?

_A/N: wow this is the first, and probably only, thing i've written under an M rating. I just felt i didn't have enough Jade and Cat and wanted to write something, plus this song has been stuck in my head. The song is sail by awolnation, my suggestion is to pull up the lyrics while you read its kind of a song fic without being a song fic. hope you like it. Review plez?_


	2. This is How an Angel Cries

**Disclaimer: Don't own, don't ask!**

Cat's Pov:

Jade isn't mad. But she also isn't talking to me. She's been mad at everyone lately, her and Beck have been arguing a lot. But i don't think shes mad that i kissed her, if so she hasn't told me. Now i made myself feel bad, what if she just hasn't told me and she secretly hates me, would she do that to me? Could she?

This is how an Angel cries. This must be. Jade is leaning on me crying. Someone saw us kiss and told Beck, I told her to blame it on me but she got mad and said she couldn't. I don't get it. But whether i get it or not Jade needs me, she's crying a lot. I feel bad cause its all my fault. I thought it was okay. I thought if i got it out it wouldn't bother me anymore. Why do people who try to help you always seem to make things worse before they know how to fix it, if they ever do?

I blame it on my sick pride. I stand here in front of Jade as she tells me she needs somebody to who loves her for who she is and won't get mad over stupid things like what i did. But how could i fess up now? She said what i did was stupid. It was stupid, but now it just hurts. But my pride tells me it'll hurt more if i open my mouth and she rejects me more. I finally hear Jade calling my name and look at her, apparently she had been calling me for a while now. "Blame it on my A.D.D. baby."


	3. Maybe I should cry for Help

Cat's pov:

Jade has me pinned to a wall, her forearm pressing against my throat making me choke. Maybe i should cry for help. Would help ever come? Would anybody help me? I wouldn't help me if i knew what i had done. I did it again. I just wanted to taste her and feel her soft lips on my again. But now i know she's mad. Where does being mad come from?

Why am i even here? Maybe i should kill myself. That would solve a lot of problems. Jade would be less mad and could get Beck back. Plus my parents, well theirs a lot of good things that would come to them if i died. But I'm mostly worried about Jade. I just want to see her smile again, that sweet real smile that only I see when we're alone. If i look in a mirror and I don't see myself who am i looking at?

Then i see it. The smile flickered across her lips as she read a song i had written a while ago. I told her not to but she never listens. I stare at the smile as it consumes her face, I know in my head that when she finished reading she would probably insult me but i hoped with my heart that she would still smile and tell me it was good. Finally she lifts her head and stares at me. I see her mouth move but i hear nothing. When she asks again whats wrong with me I say "Blame it on my A.D.D baby."


	4. Maybe I'm a Different Breed

Cat's pov:

I feel so different from everyone else. Maybe I'm a different breed. Maybe I'm my own species. Maybe they'll realize it and make a new species called Cat. Maybe i could tell scientists and make millions of dollars. But no amount of money would bring Jade back to me. I mean we still hang out but i can tell she's on guard if i get close to her. She may have lost Beck but she doesn't want me either, i can't blame her though. I wouldn't want me either. Can i person hate them self enough to think of them self as another person?

Maybe I'm not listening. Jade, Did you ever think of that? You tell me to listen cause its important but i can't. Its not me this time its you though. I can't focus when I'm forced to watch as your mouth delicately forms every word. Well i can but not on what your saying. I try to focus on a squirrel behind Jade so i could at least half hear what she says but its over before i begin. Squirrels are really fluffy you know.

I smile at her hopefully maybe she won't notice. She walks over really close to me and i suddenly wish i had been focusing. I felt myself bit my bottom lip lightly as she approached now hovering inches from my body, her face mere centimeters from mine. And i yet again close the gap between our lips without thinking, though this time she doesn't get mad. No. She just smiles and asks what that was for. I shrug and say "So blame it on my A.D.D. baby."


	5. Sail

Jade's pov:

Cat has been acting so weird. Ever since those stupid fucking doctors diagnosed her with A.D.D. shes been using it as an excuse for everything. Damn it Cat, A.D.D. is not an excuse to kiss someone. But i can't really complain. I did like it. Hell i was kind of happy when Beck broke up with me cause he heard about it. But now every time im with Cat she always blames something on her A.D.D.

Finally i get the balls to walk up to her in the hallway. I've been mentally prepping myself for this for the past like 3 hours. I was about to throw everything away on the girl with A.D.D. I grabbed her arm and turned her around, i laid my lips over her soft sweet ones. When i pulled away she had a goofy smile on her face, i was half afraid she was going to say something about A.D.D.

Its always been a dream of mine to get a boat and sail across the ocean. But now i'm on a boat with Cat. The girl with A.D.D. My girl with A.D.D. Yeah i bit the bullet and asked her. I mean after i kiss you in front of the whole school you can't expect much more from me but Cat thought that was it and i was gone. I smiled at Cat as she sat in a chair next to the captains chair, she looked so beautiful in her sun dress. I walked over so i was behind the steering wheel and smiled at her. "Sail." Is all i said before we left port for our adventure together.


End file.
